I’ve thought a lot about this question in the past few years and I realized that being an adult means there are more responsibilities and the need to keep on dreaming while trying to stay conscious. Yalah. For some people, being an adult means one cannot act like child, play with a child, or even have a silly dreams. Does that mean I have to let go all my dreams if I have to be an adult? I don’t think so.
I do agree that an adult has to be responsible and be able to act accordingly when in certain circumstances. However, that does not mean one needs to let go off his/her dreams. Although, life as an adult can be ‘very busy’, I try my very best to spend a few minutes to remind myself that I should never forget or even let go whatever I wanted to do, even when it comes to crazy dreams. Kenapa pula kalau sudah jadi dewasa, tidak pula bulih tanam impian? Takkan budak-budak saja bulih ada impian?
I admit that an adult has to carry more responsibilities which sometimes I do forget to take a deep breathe. I have been juggling between works and studies, as well as trying to stay sane and healthy for the sake of the family. Financial – That’s the most difficult subject which can sometimes ‘kill a love’ because money is everything – a matter of life and death. Tiada duit, apa macam mau kasi makan anak? Perut sendiri bulih lah kasi tahan-tahan sikit, tapi kalau perut anak?
Furthermore, I noticed that being an adult means you need to be ready physically and emotionally especially when you are surrounded by people with negative mindset. Kalau masa budak-budak, bulih lah repot sama mama kalau ada yang cakap bukan-bukan. Tapi, kalau sudah dewasa? Mau repot sama siapa? People with negative mindset are E-V-E-R-Y-W-H-E-R-E, and they can even fake themselves as nice people. The only thing that an adult has to do is – stay sane, and keep a positive mindset.
Of course, the life of an adult is full of question marks. When I was 23 years old, and was studying hard for my 1st Degree, a relative suddenly asked me to go out with this guy who was 30 years older than me. I wasn’t ready yet and I was fully aware that he was looking for a ‘wife’. I rejected him properly and told him that we can only remain as friends. Banyak hal kalau sudah jadi ‘dewasa’. Bukan sekadar soalan ‘Kau ada boyfriend/girlfriend?’ saja, tapi setiap level yang sudah kena accomplished, turus ada next soalan maut – ‘Bila mau tunang?’, ‘Bila mau kahwin?’, ‘Bila mau ada anak?’, ‘Bila mau ada anak lagi?’, ‘Sikit juga anak ko? Bila lagi mau ada anak?’, …. the questions are N-E-V-E-R-E-N-D-I-N-G. Nasiblah indada yang menanya soalan maut, ‘Bila ko mau beli coffin?’ Kalau ada soalan begitu, memang sah kana sumbat cili api tu mulut. LOL!
Last but not least, being an adult is complicated because sikijap saja turus mintutok depan laptop. I feel so ‘adult’. I’ve finally come to realization that one cannot have the freedom to choose ‘number’ of the age. No gustan, just gohed.
p.s. It’s really hard to stay awake. I zonked out a few times…