I recently installed an app called ‘Question Diary‘ on my phone. It’s a pretty interesting app as it is a free question-and-answer-based diary app for Android. So, rather than posting something that I should not do, I have decided it’s time for me to write about something that I ‘need’ to answer. Kononlah. Tapi, kalau sudah bilang menjawab soalan, kasi jawab sikit-sikitlah bah kan? Sia faham jugalah kadang-kadang ada bah yang bosan kalau balik-balik benda sama saja sia blog – buat ulasan produk. LOL.
I have a friend who told me that I really have a gut to write on the Internet. I love blogging a lot and I have been blogging ever since I was in Form 3. That was in 1998. About 20 years ago. Lama sudah bah pulak kan? Masa tu masih guna FTP, HTML, NOTEPAD, dan Geocities. It was really hard even when I got myself a free journal account at LiveJournal. The ‘hardest’ part was keeping my journal updated with what I had on my mind. I was so lucky because I got friends from other parts of the world who kept supporting me regardless of my grammar. Why I love blogging so much? It’s because I found myself a ‘dungeon’ to keep on writing despite of my grammar.
What goes around comes back around. It’s been that way forever. Baby, just look at you now, barely holding it together. We’re so in love, but you gave that up. Just look around, are you happy now? Oooh, are you happy now?
– Are You Happy Now, Rascall Flats ft. Lauren Alaina
Are you happy now? Am I happy now? Yes. I am happy now, and I am proud of myself. Being able to attain what I have now is more than what I have expected back then. Being able to be thankful for all the blessings which I have been crying in every prayers are what I cannot forget. I am happy to have the life that I got from God even though I was blaming God for the hardships that I got back then. I am proud of myself that I have gotten myself more friends that I got back then. I believe God has a purpose for me but I just need to work hard to look for the ‘answers’.
I actually feel much much better now because I always try to think positive in every situation. There may be some situations which make me feel down but that does not mean I need to accept such situation. I keep reminding myself that it might not be my time yet. Macam kita tunggu Ngiu Chap, kita harap kita punya Ngiu Chap yang mau sampai sudah tapi sekali tinguk, sebelah meja punya Ngiu Chap. I have come to an understanding that complaining would never solve the problem, though. So, all I have to do is doing it with patience. Normal jugalah kalau hilang sabar tapi harus juga belajar sabar.
Besides, I am happy that I can now forgive and forget what the past has given me before. Instead of running away and hiding, I can face people whom I have been ‘regretting for having them in my life’. Apa sia dapat kalau sia buat muka masam? Bukan kasi sia duit atau buat sia awet muda juga. However, I cannot prevent them from avoiding me because it’s their right to do so, as long as I do not have to be like them.
If you’re looking for an app that would give you a ‘better’ way of writing a journal or blog, you should try this Roller Journal for iOS where you can write down a more lively journal about your life. It does not mean you need to be 100% open to the public. Just share something else that has something to relate with what you have on mind.